NaBloPoMo Day 28: Prohibited

Did you know that...

• In Belvedere, California, one City Council order reads: "No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash."
• In Long Beach, California, it is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.
• The city of San Francisco is the only city in the nation to have ordinances guaranteeing sunshine to the masses.
• In Denver, Colorado, it is illegal to drive a black car on Sundays.
• It is illegal for barbers to give massages to nude customers unless they are for "instructional purposes" anywhere in Colorado.
• Clamming at night is illegal in Connecticut.
• In D.C., the federal government says that it is illegal to give false weather reports.
• The following things are illegal in Florida: unmarried women parachuting on Sunday, farting in public after 6 p.m. on a Thursday, oral sex, having less than $10 on your person (but only in Pensacola), and sex with porcupines.
• In Georgia, you are permitted to commit simple battery but only if provoked by "fighting words", but it is illegal to change the clothes on a mannequin unless the windowshades are lowered.
• In Hawaii, you may be fined for not owning a boat.
• In Boise, Idaho, it is illegal to fish from a giraffe's back.
• Should you be overcome by an urge to copulate in your car in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, you needn't worry. Police officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.
• Chicago law forbids eating in any establishment that is on fire.
• In Normal, Illinois, it is against the law to make faces at dogs.
• Also in Illinois, it is legal to protest naked in front of City Hall as long as you are under the age of seventeen and have the proper permit.
• All males aged 18-50 must work six days per year on public roads.
• The following things are illegal in Indiana: passing a horse on the street, a liquor store selling cold soft drinks, for a man to be sexually aroused in public, for barbers to threaten to cut off kid's ears, to sell cars on Sunday.
• You can, however, satisfy any obligation to pay for a dependant's medical care in Indiana by praying for him/her.
• In Marshaltown, Iowa, it is illegal for horses to eat fire hydrants.
• There is an ordinance prohibiting whale hunting in Kansas.
• It is illegal in Kentucky to marry the same man more than three times.
• In Lexington, it is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
• By law, anyone who has been drinking in Kentucky is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
• Also in Kentucky: "No person shall sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange, display or possess living baby chicks, ducklings, or other fowl or rabbits which have been dyed or colored; nor dye or color any baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits; nor sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange or to give away baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits, under two months of age in any quantity less than six, except that any rabbit weighing three pounds or more may be sold at an age of six weeks. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than $100 nor more than $500." (Did that remind anyone of Lloyd's speech from "Say Anything" about not wanting to buy, sell, or process anything?)
• Mourners at a wake in Louisiana may not eat more than three sandwiches.
• In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
• Also in Maryland, it is illegal to give or receive oral sex.
• In Massachusetts, bullets may not be used as currency.

You know, I'm going to stop right there. You never know when I might be short a blog post.