Sunday, February 8, 2009

Day 8: Parent Fail

There are some areas in which my parenting falls woefully short. My kid is going on four years old, and he's still not potty trained. He is not even close, and I have no idea how to fix it. We ask him twenty times a day if he needs to go potty, and the answer is always no, even if he is visably in mid-poop. Also, I cannot get him to go to bed at night. We've tried everything. We've had to institute a policy of taking a toy away every time he gets up and putting it in a "naughty box." He has to earn his toys back from the naughty box by being extra-good.

So far, the goddamn naughty box is not working. Half his room is in the naughty box, and the little shit just got up for about the fifteenth time. I'm about to put his ass in the naughty box.

I have no idea if my parenting is to blame for any of this, but I am so tired of touching poop, I could just frickin' cry.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

There is a paperback book out called "How to Potty Train in One Day." It really works. You buy a inexpensive doll that wets (WalMart), lots of pop or juice, salty things like chips, etc. I this technique on my son when he woke up from his afternoon nap until 6 p.m. at night and he was trained. The first night my husband and I took him to the bathroom before we went to bed but really, after that it was not necessary. They are really trained. I could probably count on one hand how many accidents there were after that. One needs to make sure that your phone calls are put on the message machine and that your meals are made while you and son are in training. There is no spanking involved but rewards and uniqueness to how they teach the child to use the potty. Don't skim the book like I did and fail. You need to read it and follow it exactly. It's very creative. The child does learn and gets tired of the practicing if they do have an accident. I think I remember that if they have an accident during training, they go through the steps of the entire practice 10xs. It's a short duration of training but definitely worth it. :)
A mom of three trained kids. :)

merseydotes said...

Go nuclear on his tiny ass: reverse the door handle so you can lock his door from the outside. Lock him in his room at night. It's hardcore, but my cousin did it with her son, and after a few nights, he learned to stay in his bed. Or, at least, in his room.

Erika Jean said...

Don't ask him if he needs to go potty. just say its time to go potty!

Kerry said...

If it helps, this is what my mom used on me to get me to sleep so she could put me to bed (I remember her doing this when I was five). When it came time for bed, she would hold me tight and rock me. When ever I fussed or tried to get down, she would say, "Shhh, You're asleep." If I argued, she would tell me I was asleep. If I fought she would tell me I was asleep. And we would stay there until I was asleep.

I'm not saying this will work like magic, but when he realizes he can't win, he may give in.

Can't help wit hthe poop though. I can't even get my cat to stop using the bathroom in the closet 1 foot away from her litter box.

Kerry said...

If it helps, this is what my mom used on me to get me to sleep so she could put me to bed (I remember her doing this when I was five). When it came time for bed, she would hold me tight and rock me. When ever I fussed or tried to get down, she would say, "Shhh, You're asleep." If I argued, she would tell me I was asleep. If I fought she would tell me I was asleep. And we would stay there until I was asleep.

I'm not saying this will work like magic, but when he realizes he can't win, he may give in.

Can't help wit hthe poop though. I can't even get my cat to stop using the bathroom in the closet 1 foot away from her litter box.